Spring Thoughts

Written for my bi-weekly column “An Occasional Word” in The St. Lawrence Plaindealer, a printed newspaper serving the Canton, New York Community.

I know people say it every year, but this spring really flew by. In all honesty, it still feels like late February or early March. The gift from Mother Nature on April 8 only furthered my delusions. Imagine my surprise when I walked down the stairs of my house last Tuesday to find snow outside. And not some momentary flurry with nothing sticking to the ground — it was a full on snowstorm.

“What is this, purgatory?” one of my roommates sighs.

“It feels like a slow burn to spring,” another friend adds. “Punxsutawney Phil severely underestimated how many more weeks of winter we had left… he should be fired.”

I couldn’t agree more. Of course I love winter – why else would I attend college 20 minutes from the Canadian border? But I would be lying if I said I didn’t yearn for some sunshine after three months of frigid temperatures and snow-covered grass.

Each person walking through the front door of my sorority house – including me – wore the same defeated look. I looked like a diva trudging through the St. Lawrence campus all day, crossing my arms, head tilted low, rolling my eyes, and wearing an expression that screamed “I’m so done with this.”

So much for bringing my winter parka home because there was no way I’d be needing it past March. Of course I have plenty of warm jackets, but the knee-length, wind-resistant qualities of that parka are simply better suited to these wintery conditions.

It honestly felt surreal, almost as if I had been transported back in time two months. Worst April Fools prank ever. Oh wait. At this point they should just call the SLU semesters Fall and Winter. Why is the second semester called spring if the temperature only rises above 50 degrees for a maximum of 10 days before we leave for summer vacation?

I am nostalgic about the past, longing for past seasons of my life like re-watching my favorite show over and over. Sometimes I wish I could return to January, back when I had just gotten back to campus, when I didn’t have to worry about leaving my favorite place in less than a month.

There is something about knowing you have plenty of time left doing something or being somewhere you love. Kind of like going on a 5-day vacation; the first two and a half days are carefree, but then I start thinking about leaving in two days…two nights…tomorrow…tonight… in a few hours. Future thinking definitely takes over my headspace more than I would like to admit.

As a first-year at SLU, all I knew was time. Time to meet friends, to be on a team, to join clubs, to dance around the Tick-Tock Inn with my best friends. Not only did the spring fly by, it feels like my entire college experience has. I leave St. Lawrence in less than a month for summer vacation. Then I return as a senior with one year left to do all the things I once thought I had so much time to complete.

So maybe it’s not the snow itself that made me feel disoriented last Tuesday. Perhaps it was the false consolation that the year isn’t actually almost over and I won’t be a rising senior next month. This time next year I will be preparing for graduation – the final step in growing up.

Where did the time go?